Boy, can I take a joke!!! Thanks Mom and Dad for playing "Your Mother" jokes with me when I was ten so, the kid can have a thick skin: 

Mommy Davis says "Keenan, Your mom's so fat, when she turns around they throw her a welcome back party" (and yes you caught that right, my mother would tell them to me, which is basically telling them about herself...you gotta love it lol) 

I went to Vegas one week last year for the birthday of one of my best friends in the world and old college roommate, Jeff Meade. Long story, short...all of my college friends (guys and girls) flew out to Vegas to do it up for Jeff’s 30th. Amongst the reunions, there was also me and my college girlfriend, Myisha. Now mind you I hadn't seen Myisha in literally 10 years and back then, let’s just say the kid looked a little different. About 75 pounds different! Now it ain't all Long Beaches and late night ham sandwiches, part of it is that I decided to get a chest and work out and then the Long Beaches & ham sandwiches ruined all the diesel-ness and has me operating at only about 85% sexy. 

Sidebar: Long Beaches are Long Island Iced Teas with Cranberry instead of Coke…same bang for the buck but, just a tad sweeter…learned that one when all the guys would meet up for drinks after Alcohol Anonymous Cl@ss 

Just to bring this full circle to you and explain why Myisha’s was literally on the ground laughing hysterically with tears in her eyes…here’s a before and after shot (circa 2002 & circa 8/31/06 around 2 AM): 

Here's the pic:


Even funnier, Myisha knew me 25 pounds lighter than the circa 2002 shot. Boy, can I take a joke!!! 4 straight days of being called fatty and big drawers!!! LOL LOL. If I wasn’t drunk off free Long Beaches while getting taken for all my loot at the poker table, I might've been upset. 

And that’s a whole 'nother story, I think I had more alcohol than blood in my system this weekend. My hands were literally shaking as I tried to stack my chips after winning with a pair of 4's in the Aladdin’s Poker Room. I HAD THE SHAKES!!! LOL LOL!!! It might also explain why after parlaying $50 bucks in to $620 over an hour and a half of Texas Hold-em, I immediately lost it all within 7 minutes. Kids, 3 Long Beaches at 2:00 in the afternoon in 95 degree heat makes for a bad combination with Adult ADD when gambling...remember that Unky Kee told you so!

Keenan “I’m Big Boned” Davis 
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