In all my travels across this fine city of Gotham, I started to notice something that is very disturbing to me and needs to stop. Fellas, I'm talking to you!!! Let me back up a second. We've all seen and remember the "Man Law" commercials that Miller was showing on TV. Well there's a lot of topics that they haven't quite covered. So for the next several weeks, I'm going to add a few "man laws" that need to be followed forthwith. 

OK, there's an epidemic going around and it's time someone brought some light to it, so: 

MAN LAW 587: YOUR WOMAN SHOULD NOT BE BIGGER THAN YOU!!! 

Fellas, if your girl has broader shoulders than you do, find a new girl. Dawg, if your woman can carry you across the threshold, don't marry her. If you have to tippety-toe to kiss her, time for a replacement. If you often confuse her socks, boy-shorts and/or wife-beaters for your own, the gr@ss truly is greener (and smaller) on the other side!!! 

Let's think about this, it just looks funny fellas lol lol!!! I'm all for the big girls getting love too (hell I can admit that I've hit one or two that tipped the scales a bit too much or looked me eye to eye) but, you gotta know when to say when!!! Could you imagine me walking around with a chick that was bigger than me…she'd have to be 6'3" and 240…that's not a good look! It's ok if I'm 6'6" and 300!!! But, when you're 5'7" and a buck sixty (soaking wet), leave the 6 foot women alone…you can't handle her and if you talk slick one night, she might yoke you up!!! Reporting your woman for domestic abuse cuz, she flipped and beat you down, is not gangsta!!! 

So, fellas, go home, line up back to back with your woman and ask your mother who's taller! If you lose, sit your girl down and have a heart-to-heart! If she has a bigger waist (not bigger booty, a bigger waist) also, again it's time to have a sit-down. 

Keenan "Abider of Man Laws" Davis